October 25, 2011

You say "Tomahtoe", I say Tomaytoe"..

My friend Tom, the only conservative in Portland, Oregon, provides these terminology comparatives:
Translations of Common Euphemisms

DEMOCRAT: Arsenal of Weapons
REPUBLICAN: Gun Collection

DEMOCRAT: Delicate Wetlands
REPUBLICAN: Swamp

DEMOCRAT: Undocumented Worker
REPUBLICAN: Illegal Alien

DEMOCRAT: Cruelty-Free Materials
REPUBLICAN: Synthetic Fiber

DEMOCRAT: Assault and Battery
REPUBLICAN: Attitude Adjustment

DEMOCRAT: Heavily Armed
REPUBLICAN: Well-protected

DEMOCRAT: Narrow-minded
REPUBLICAN: Righteous

DEMOCRAT: Taxes or Your Fair Share
REPUBLICAN: Coerced Theft

DEMOCRAT: Commonsense Gun Control
REPUBLICAN: Gun Confiscation Plot

DEMOCRAT: Illegal Hazardous Explosives
REPUBLICAN: Fireworks or Stump Removal

DEMOCRAT: Non-viable Tissue Mass
REPUBLICAN: Unborn Baby

DEMOCRAT: Equal Access to Opportunity
REPUBLICAN: Socialism

DEMOCRAT: Multicultural Community
REPUBLICAN: High Crime Area

DEMOCRAT: Fairness or Social Progress
REPUBLICAN: Marxism

DEMOCRAT: Upper Class or "The Rich "
REPUBLICAN: Self-Employed

DEMOCRAT: Progressive, Change
REPUBLICAN: Big Government Scheme

DEMOCRAT: Homeless or Disadvantaged
REPUBLICAN: Bums or Welfare Leeches

DEMOCRAT: Sniper Rifle
REPUBLICAN: Scoped Deer Rifle

DEMOCRAT: Investment For the Future
REPUBLICAN: Higher Taxes

DEMOCRAT: Healthcare Reform
REPUBLICAN: Socialized Medicine

DEMOCRAT: Extremist, Judgmental, or Hater
REPUBLICAN: Conservative

DEMOCRAT: Truants
REPUBLICAN: Homeschoolers

DEMOCRAT: Victim or Oppressed
REPUBLICAN: Criminal or Lazy Good-For-Nothing

DEMOCRAT: High Capacity Magazine
REPUBLICAN: Standard Capacity Magazine

DEMOCRAT: Religious Zealot
REPUBLICAN: Church-going

DEMOCRAT: Reintroduced Wolves
REPUBLICAN: Sheep and Elk Killers

DEMOCRAT: Fair Trade Coffee
REPUBLICAN: Overpriced Yuppie Coffee

DEMOCRAT: Exploiters or "The Rich "
REPUBLICAN: Employed or Land Owner

DEMOCRAT: The Gun Lobby
REPUBLICAN: NRA Members

DEMOCRAT: Assault Weapon
REPUBLICAN: Semi-Auto (Grandpa's M1 Carbine)

DEMOCRAT: Fiscal Stimulus
REPUBLICAN: New Taxes and Higher Taxes

DEMOCRAT: Same Sex Marriage
REPUBLICAN: Legalized Perversion

DEMOCRAT: Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting
REPUBLICAN: Chinese Mercury-Laden Light Bulbs

DEMOCRAT: Accepted Facts
REPUBLICAN: Horse Shit

Note: the crappy quality of this post this afternoon was due to the proxy server at work vapor-locking. Shhhhhhhh!
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