February 16, 2012


"Klaatu Borada Nicto, Ya'all"
There is a gentleman who lives in a large U. S. city South of me here in California. He keeps assailing me with notices of his incessant efforts to get Barack Obama impeached on the grounds of citizenship.

Yes, he is a birther and, yes, that ship has sailed.

I wearied of these missives and attempted to "unsibscribe" from his e-mails to no avail. So I had RoadRunner automatically consign them to the trash bin where they will be eventually be flushed. One day, I went to the trash bin, and, while I was pawing through the SEXY TEENAGE CHEERLEADERS WILL SELL YOU VIAGRA and the SEXY TEENAGE KENYAN CHEERLEADER MINISTERS OF FINANCE  notes, I found one of his and thought I'd strike up a conversation with this guy just to see if he had  any depth; was not that one-dimensional. It took a couple of times to get a response but I thought I'd post the conversation with this guy for your edification/amusement.

Now, to be perfectly fair, he is a perfectly nice person. I met him once at a Tea Party demonstration against Bags Pelosi and -- although a little rough around the edges and evincing the mannerisms of a guy who runs a little lean -- he was somewhat enjoyable to speak with. Also, this resurrected e-mail conversation does NOT seek to point out how stupid he is and how brilliant I am. It's just one of those little slices of life we all get as we wait for a bus, sit in the doctor's office, stand at a urinal, etc.

Some of you may agree with him and some of you may agree with me, but that's what makes a horse race.

The personal stuff is redacted. It starts out innocently enough:
From: The War Planner
To: The Other Person
Sent: Sat, February 11, 2012 8:47:52 PM
Subject: Re: Judge Malihi is an Iranian Muslim??

I repeat my question I asked in response to your previous e-mail:

It's November 6th and you have two choices for president, Mitt Romney or Barack Obama.

Who will you vote for and why?


The War Planner
Innocent enough? Here's his response:
---- The Other Guy wrote:
I'm not voting for either one of those bastards, sorry.  Hope that helps.

The Other Guy
Still pretty innocent. I guess my response below was a little heavy handed:
From: The War Planner
To: The Other Person
Sent:Wed, February 15, 2012 9:42:39 AM
Subject: Re: Judge Malihi is an Iranian Muslim??

It does.

Please remove me from your mailing list and I want to thank you for being one of
the a**holes who will be saddling us with Obama for four more years. At present,
you are no better than the mindless mouth-breathing independents who brought us
your Beloved Obama in the first place. Hope you enjoy ObamaCare and the two
bright shiny new commie SCOTUS justices we will be getting.

The War Planner
Hey, I guess I was spoiling for a fight. Here's his response:
---- The Other Guy wrote:
Go tell someone else how to vote, commie, who gives a shit what you think.

The Other Guy
It's on!

Well, being in a playful mood and not now being nor never have been a member of the Communist Party, I let the other guy have it with both barrels:
From: The War Planner
To: The Other Person
Subject: Appropriate Response
Date: Thursday, February 16, 2012 6:56 AM

You *do* have a way with rhetoric, don't you?

..sorry if I offended you. It's just that the irony of someone like you who
despises Obama so much will probably be doing more to get him re-elected than
his most ardent fans. I loathe the bastard as much as you do and, under more
civil circumstances, we would probably have worked together to defeat him. But
you and your obdurate, intransigent, zero-tolerance conservatism along with the
others like you will assure four more years of this flamer and with it an
absolute certainty that ObamaCare will NOT be repealed.

Our egomaniacal Pantload POTUS will absolutely veto any attempt to scuttle his
legacy. Once that piece of legislation starts crapping dollars out to the
non-tax-paying grifters in our society, it becomes indelibly woven into our
fabric as an entitlement. Also, ANYTHING that our
possibly-Republican-controlled Congress puts on his desk will be vetoed as well.
Democrats will applaud him as the last bastion against the incredible Tea Party
assault of 2010/2012 and there will be NOTHING done to roll back the spending.
We will be in for another four years of debt-ceiling kabuki like we had last

Finally, what I alluded to before will come to pass. He will appoint AT LEAST
two ultra-liberal justices to the SCOTUS.

The net effect will be to turn this pile of dog crap into a folk hero for the
libs -- a modern day FDR replete with minority affirmative action creds -- all
because narrow-minded gorts like yourself refuse to think strategically; you
prefer the all-out frontal assault instead of a flanking movement. Suggest you
read up on General George Pickett.

But I suppose all of this is way over your head and outside of your ken so let
me couch my response in verbiage more commensurate with your diminished
cognitive processes. Oh yeah, how about this:


The War Planner
O.K., I ain't all that innocent and I did unload on the guy. I am heartily sorry for my tantrum. But I just wanted to let him know the consequences of his actions. I ain't sayin' that ya gotta vote for Romney (or Santorum), but don't tell me you hate Obama, think he's a closet Kenyan, and want to move heaven and Earth to rid this country of him..

..and yet won't pull the lever for the GOP nominee if it's Romney?

Doesn't add up. Thanks for listening to my rant.

UPDATE: Here's my more visual response to The Other Guy:



  1. Your such a sensitive a$$hole TWP. You have to persuade him with honey. Tell him how Romney would service him under the table for his vote. I think Romney is a bigger piece of $hit than McCain.

    But alas ... I will have to vote for him if he gets the Nod.

  2. Odie..

    ..you're a sketch! Sorry I missed the opportunity. Think of this post as a captured conversation between two screaming assholes. the only difference between us is that I'll cop to the title and The Other Person wanders along in life not understanding strategy.

    Thank goodness you do!

    Stay thirsty, my friend!

  3. I'm guessing your pen pal is a PaulBot. Certainly sounds like one. There are many similarities in debating PaulBots and Progressives. You handled him the only way possible - Give No Quarter, Take No Prisoners. Upon capture, they whine incessantly from the cells and become a more trouble than they are worth under sequester.

    “Because the Only Good Progressive is a Failed Progressive”

  4. LAS:

    I think you're being far too kind to me. I wanted to emphasize that it was a difference of opinion and how I go into meltdown mode when I encounter someone who is -- yet, is not -- as ABO as I am. Or, as I put it, whose only strategy involves a tired, discredited frontal assault and eschews a perfectly sound method of ridding our country of this sack of shit.

    Obdurate, intransigent, and feckless.

    Thanks for your comment and your visit!