Economy got you down?

With the new dismal economic numbers coming out about falling retail sales and unemployment, folks wanting to put on a happy face will have to be more inventive about their methodology -- or otherwise risk the possibility of raising municipal revenues. Seems Obama has not quashed the American entrepreneurial spirit completely (though the Dems' policies have made a good start) with these ideas to secretly carry around that "Brighter Day" elixir:

This via the Little Miss Attila blog.

MALADROIT SEGUE: Oh, and while I am on the subject, I just wanted to carp about something (anything!) since I am in one of my bipolar downswings. The Other McCain posted this advisory to nascent bloggers like me (coming up on my one-year anniversary in August, О чем Этот Blog Является Всем) on how to get a million hits. Although I am a software developer and pretty good at tech things, I am a few pages behind extant really whiz-bang stuff. For example, I don't do FaceBook. I don't Tweet. (Sounds fruity or perverted and how could one possibly convey an intellectual thought in only 140 characters?) And there's a lot of other stuff that can be classified as as narcissistic, neo-tech persiflage.

But I am just insecure enough to be lured by the siren calls of website popularity; like many other simpering, pajama-wearing, PBJ-wolfing, basement-dwelling blog writers, I crave attention. The prospect of Ed Morrissey -- or, better, Michelle Malkin -- pouring their cup of morning joe while poring over my deathless prose is just too alluring an image to be dispelled by reality.

So I bit. I followed as many of Robert Stacy McCain's recommendations as I could technically comprehend, among them, linking to his site and linking to Miss Attila's site. And, and, and..

..my hit count went down!

I mean, compared to the inestimable Left Coast Rebel and MAinfo.com my visit numbers were hyper-anemic. I think I got as many stoppers-by in toto as Odie gets whenever he puts up one of those spectacular bumper sticker or Walmart series he runs. LCR gets more in a day than I get in a month! Like the California Almond Growers, all I am asking is one ping a day from each of you.

So what's the deal, Neil? Where'd everyone go? I mean, I took a shower this morning; I brushed my teeth; the can of Right Guard maybe a little low, but I use it religiously.

So I can't explain it but now I am getting desperate (and more insecure) and am looking for at a number of options. You know, like unlinking The Other McCain and Miss Attila being the most obvious or maybe asking ol' Stacy for a refund. But also things like offering a two-for-one sale: visit my site now and I'll give you another visit for free. Or perhaps going over to KOS or Huffpo and starting a war. How about linking Little Green Footballs to my site? If things get really dreary, I might just hit McCain's tip jar.

I am open for suggestions but don't tell me to write more interesting, exciting things because I gotta rule that out because that sort of thing is wa-a-a-a-ay above my pathetic pay grade.

DISCLAIMER:  I am actually not as desperate as I pretend. This is kind of fun to do and I do bump into some pretty nice people who stop by. I am not sure how good things would be if there were hunnerts o' comments and I were compelled to answer to each one.