November 13, 2011

The Lazy Blogger

Sorry folks, but like so many of us, I have been a little bit lazy of late -- or The Immense Bowel Movement of a POTUS would have you believe we are -- and the curse of the Proxy Server has struck again/ So that's why this site appears moribund.

But there's also a lot on this person's plate what with work, new USAFR responsibilities and the fact that The Woodsterman will be heading into town this Friday and all. One bright spot in an otherwise dismal November week. I get a change to tie into some Beefeaters, talk politics with MA, LL, and Odie, and maybe -- juts maybe -- I can figure out how to port TWP to another ISP so I can bootleg posts at work.



November 8, 2011

"Out of Airspeed, Altitude and Ideas"

Courtesy my co-worker and soaring enthusiast, Herr Frank Deischel, this series epitomizes one of the cardinal commandments of flying: "Keep thy airspeed up on final approach lest the ground rise up and smite the.."

..oh well, any landing you can walk away from..


November 5, 2011

Riddle of the day..

How do you starve an Obama supporter ??

It's really very simple, just hide their food stamps under their work shoes.



OVERHEARD AT ZUCOTTI PARK: ..a conversation.
Mind-blown Hippie Wastrel:'s Occupy Wall Street, Occupy Portland, Occupy Oakland, Occupy Los Angeles, Philadelphia. There's even Occupy demonstrations ion Europe.

Scraggly, Moon-Chick:, isn't it?

MBHW: Yeah, but how come there;s no Occupy Paris?

SMC: Yeah. thought that was what Germany was for.
PERTINENT REMINDER UPDATE: One year from today, we go to the polls and throw the prancing metro-sexual Nancy-boy incompetent boob POTUS and all of his clown troupe out onto the street.

It's a Leap Year, don't you know..


November 4, 2011

Boggling the mind, stretching credulity..

..and stuff like that. In its nascent days, someone made a joke about the way to clear out Zucotti Park -- and Denver and Portland and Oakland and all of the other new age, consciousness-raised disaffected shit holes springing all over the country -- would be to set up an employment table offering jobs to the denizens.

Well, life imitates art and the result is this wonderful collage of surreal excuses colliding with workforce integration:

Raise bamboo on the roof tops? Why didn't I think about that? Come to think about it, why didn't Obama think about that?

On a more sober note, one wonders how many bona fide businesses spring up from this Zucotti Park Be-In. Think about it. Some hippie astro-chick starts hawking her brownies at the festival and they become a hit. Cut to 10 years later and this lady is the head of a multi-million corporate owner whose daily fret has become the bottom line and those pesky workers striking for higher wages and more benefits. Zap! Instant capitalist.

..just sayin'.

TRIVIA QUESTION UPDATE: Anyone remember Maynard G. Krebs and why this would be relevant to the video above?


November 3, 2011


Man am I pissed off.

..bastards at work rigged the proxy server to block Blogger blogs so, with my heavy duty schedule, I am probably going to move TWP to WordPress or host it on another ISP. It's not like I spend a lot of time blogging. I just do one or two posts per day when an idea hits (usually on my break) and compose and post them at lunch or between debugging my software.

And, no I can't do this at night because, frankly, I am too fried.

So, I am researching exporting/importing and all of that crapola. Sorry about that.

The real annoying thing is I can't visit Odie's site. 


November 2, 2011



Sometimes I just *Love* John Boehner..

In response to Obama's contention that "We're better off now than.."

..Hell's bells, I can't even write this stuff without reaching for a vomit bag. Anyway, here's the Speaker's response:

..Note to Odie: I won the proxy server battle here at work. Expect the worst (again).


October 29, 2011

Instant Karma's gonna get you..

..they say it's the earliest New York City snowfall since the Civil War.

Sure do feel sorry for the OWS folks, don't you?

SEMI-TANGENTIAL-NON-UPDATE UPDATE: Scooter over at Big Hairy News has gone underground and infiltrated the OWS protest. I commend his colorful commentary to you as a must read. As sample:
8:12 AM - I was too lazy to go out for breakfast, so I joined the mutants and walking dead in the free food line. This morning they were serving "homemade stone-ground granola," and while it had the consistency and weight of pea gravel, it didn't taste bad - I had like 5 servings.
Be sure to read all five days of our stout lad's adventures. It's a side-splitter.


October 25, 2011

You say "Tomahtoe", I say Tomaytoe"..

My friend Tom, the only conservative in Portland, Oregon, provides these terminology comparatives:
Translations of Common Euphemisms

DEMOCRAT: Arsenal of Weapons
REPUBLICAN: Gun Collection

DEMOCRAT: Delicate Wetlands

DEMOCRAT: Undocumented Worker
REPUBLICAN: Illegal Alien

DEMOCRAT: Cruelty-Free Materials
REPUBLICAN: Synthetic Fiber

DEMOCRAT: Assault and Battery
REPUBLICAN: Attitude Adjustment

DEMOCRAT: Heavily Armed
REPUBLICAN: Well-protected

DEMOCRAT: Narrow-minded

DEMOCRAT: Taxes or Your Fair Share
REPUBLICAN: Coerced Theft

DEMOCRAT: Commonsense Gun Control
REPUBLICAN: Gun Confiscation Plot

DEMOCRAT: Illegal Hazardous Explosives
REPUBLICAN: Fireworks or Stump Removal

DEMOCRAT: Non-viable Tissue Mass

DEMOCRAT: Equal Access to Opportunity

DEMOCRAT: Multicultural Community
REPUBLICAN: High Crime Area

DEMOCRAT: Fairness or Social Progress

DEMOCRAT: Upper Class or "The Rich "
REPUBLICAN: Self-Employed

DEMOCRAT: Progressive, Change
REPUBLICAN: Big Government Scheme

DEMOCRAT: Homeless or Disadvantaged
REPUBLICAN: Bums or Welfare Leeches

DEMOCRAT: Sniper Rifle
REPUBLICAN: Scoped Deer Rifle

DEMOCRAT: Investment For the Future
REPUBLICAN: Higher Taxes

DEMOCRAT: Healthcare Reform
REPUBLICAN: Socialized Medicine

DEMOCRAT: Extremist, Judgmental, or Hater
REPUBLICAN: Conservative

REPUBLICAN: Homeschoolers

DEMOCRAT: Victim or Oppressed
REPUBLICAN: Criminal or Lazy Good-For-Nothing

DEMOCRAT: High Capacity Magazine
REPUBLICAN: Standard Capacity Magazine

DEMOCRAT: Religious Zealot
REPUBLICAN: Church-going

DEMOCRAT: Reintroduced Wolves
REPUBLICAN: Sheep and Elk Killers

DEMOCRAT: Fair Trade Coffee
REPUBLICAN: Overpriced Yuppie Coffee

DEMOCRAT: Exploiters or "The Rich "
REPUBLICAN: Employed or Land Owner

DEMOCRAT: The Gun Lobby

DEMOCRAT: Assault Weapon
REPUBLICAN: Semi-Auto (Grandpa's M1 Carbine)

DEMOCRAT: Fiscal Stimulus
REPUBLICAN: New Taxes and Higher Taxes

DEMOCRAT: Same Sex Marriage
REPUBLICAN: Legalized Perversion

DEMOCRAT: Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting
REPUBLICAN: Chinese Mercury-Laden Light Bulbs

DEMOCRAT: Accepted Facts

Note: the crappy quality of this post this afternoon was due to the proxy server at work vapor-locking. Shhhhhhhh!

October 22, 2011

Goodbye Alice..

It seems I am assailing you all on these pages with glimpses into my personal life, complaining because my schedule will not permit my blogging, etc. I apologize if this borders on the maudlin, but I wanted to say goodbye to a family member here.

Alice, 1997-2011

Back in 1997, I had a growing son and I had some health problems, and -- somehow -- these two factors coalesced into the need/desire to add a puppy to our household. I always lament these decisions because it adds an inevitable day like last Thursday to your life.

Briefly, we resolved to rescue a puppy from an animal shelter here in Southern California and made plans to visit no less than five this one day to survey all of the prospects and repair home to analyze and make a measured decision, etc.

Long story short, in THE VERY FIRST PLACE we walked into, there were two young girls who were dropping off someone they found at a swap meet in Pasadena with her brothers and sisters a week ago. (They had managed to give away all but this one.) She was an adorable little black mixed-breed (mostly Greyhound) who melted our hearts from the very start.

Thus ended our search and Alice -- as she was named by my son -- became part of our family.

Since we did not know her official birthday, we backdated her life and ascribed Thanksgiving as the special day. Each year we would have roast beef and she would get the bone as a birthday present. I guess, at first, we eschewed the traditional turkey for a change and then this tradition stuck with us as a coincidental celebration of Alice's birthday.

She was graceful, sleek, could run like the wind (her Greyhound heritage), and spent the better part of her life in good health with a cheerful spirit. Each morning  I would wrestle with my son over the necessity of walking and feeding her. Somehow his activities would conspire such that the walking fell to me and the feeding fell to his mom. But it was a duty I undertook, once engaged, with great cheer. And, for the record, when he walked Alice, he did cheerfully for he loved Alice as much as we.

Alice's and my special times were Saturday and Sunday mornings before the others waked up. She and I would go to a local school yard where I would throw a ball to her for a time and then I would sit beneath a tree while she explored the grounds she had staked out many, many times before.

When she reached the absolute farthest point in that yard she could get from me, she would pause from her sniffing and look up. I would wave to her and she would make the maddest dash you would ever see back to me, stopping a few yards short and incessantly barking until I obliged and threw the ball again for her to chase.

When she tired of that, she would come over and quietly sit by me as I read and relaxed. Presently, we would head back home to rejoin the waking family. The picture above is of her on one of those days.

So, after a life that would seemingly go on forever, last Thursday she lay down, coughed a few times and seemingly stretched out to take a nap..

..and was gone.

I took her to a vet to confirm her passing and was assured there was no pain. My son and friends visited her while she was at her final rest and my mom and sisters and sons (who all knew her) all sent their regrets and sorrow, etc. I must conclude that she was loved and will be missed.

But now the loneliness of a Saturday morning without a walk with her closes in and I must write this.

My hope is that when my time comes, I will go to heaven and that there will be sunny days and a schoolyard close by and a nice tree to sit under..

..and a ball to throw to Alice.


October 19, 2011