Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch standard 4 pound dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.
British engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains. Arrangements were made, and a gun was sent to the British engineers. When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow.
The horrified Brits sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the US scientists for suggestions.
NASA responded with a one-line memo:
"Defrost the chicken."
-30-
This story could have been believable had the bumbling researchers been inhabitants of the Obama 'War Room,' at the White House, rather than some dopey Brits.
ReplyDeleteFYI: by the time the UCLA Bruins show up in Eugene, they could very well expect to be playing the #1 ranked team in the nation: the current over-rated #1 Buckeyes are facing a tough game in Madison, WI on Saturday vs the #18 ranked Badgers, and the Ducks will be sitting comfortably in their 'man chairs,' beer and pizza in hand as they enjoy watching that game during their bye week.
Thanks TWP.
ReplyDeleteOH shit you got me good! Great laugh.
ReplyDeleteFredd,
ReplyDeleteAin't sayin' nothing to disagree as the DUX are awesome. But UCLA reminds me of the old Stanford teams who would take down a top-ranked Notre Date or Michigan or Nebraska on the road and then return home to blow it out their ass to San Jose State or some other set-up.
Who'da thunk UCLA would be 7-70 against the Bay Area?
The good thing in all of this is that the rest of the PAC)_whatever has to play against a very , very strong schedule and that means that the University of Soiled Condoms will be sucking wind over the next three-four years.
LMAO! Thanks War!
ReplyDelete..wonder if that "defrost the chicken" line will ever replace the famous "just keep [poking] that chicken" remark?
ReplyDelete